Most parents use the hard hand when it comes to disciplining their kids. This can involve spankings most of the time. Parents justify this method as the best way to make sure they raise kids who will become responsible and self-disciplined people in the future. While this method can help, you have to understand that it has its own consequences. In fact, if you spank, yell, or punish, your kids will react to the situation aggressively. This is where the concept of discipline without punishment comes in. Here are things you should learn with this concept.
What is discipline without punishment?
The term itself suggests the meaning of the concept. It is imposing discipline without the usual punishment like spanking, and hitting. It will also eliminate the need to impose timeouts, a form of symbolic abandonment, where the child will feel alone even in the scariest moments of their lives. Instead of timeouts, time-ins can be implemented. This is where you can connect to your child warmly while creating an atmosphere for safety. This is a better way to help your child realise that he is not alone and gives him time to process his feelings until he eventually recognises his mistakes.
Punishment and its effects on parent-child relationship
Punishment has to be eliminated in the process of guiding a child because it can affect the parent-child relationship. When you are angry all the time, the child tends to copy what you show him. When you punish him, there is a greater tendency too that he becomes angry and defensive. Once you punish your child, he will suddenly turn off the reasoning.
Punishment makes the child forget
Punishment is not a guarantee that your child will learn from his own mistake. In fact, he will tend to quickly forget the bad behaviour which led to his punishment. This is because he is too busy defending himself just to get out of the situation. If there is one thing he will learn when you punish him then that will be the fact that he should lie next time so he will not get caught.
Discipline without punishment will strengthen the relationship
Disciplining can be done in a different light without punishing the child. This will help you reconnect with him in the process. When you tend to spank, you do not influence him to become better. Instead, you show him some hard realisations. In fact, he will disconnect with you so you can have lesser influence on him as he grows up. Teach the right lessons without punishing your child.
Discipline without punishment helps you rebuild the connection while you set limits. When you do so, there is less drama and there will be more love in the family. Your child will readily accept the limits more than he does with the punishment you give him. When he does, he will become more willing to take responsibility for his actions. This process will show him a model of emotional self-regulation thus he learns to become more responsible for his actions and he also realises how important it is to manage his own emotions and behaviour.
What you can do to guide child without punishment
It is always important to start by regulating your own emotions so that your child will learn how to manage his. Learn the value of empathy and set limits with empathy. Give support so he can learn and connect before you even correct the action. Make sure you reconnect every day. Find a way to say yes even when a situation may somewhat call for a no. This means becoming more positive and less negative. Above all, compassion is always the secret to achieving results.
It is crucial that this type of discipline is being implemented by a Thornhill daycare center once you enrol him in one. This is to avoid conflict between the type of discipline you use and that of what is being used in school.